Antonym: Confront.

I have an issue.

I avoid.

Examples:

If I know I'm running short on money, It stresses me out so I just don't look at my bank account until I absolutely have to. I would rather not know.

If someone takes advantage of me, or does something to hurt me instead of confronting them and dealing with the situation, I try and work around it because I don't like to make a big deal out of things.

Today when I was dealing with stressful summer financial aid stuff, even though I knew it was something that HAD to be done today I had the thought "I'll do this later...I have SO much other stuff to take care of!" I had to snap out of it and remind myself that if I didn't get this done (and even if I did) I might not be able to pay for this summer.

That is when I started thinking about my issue.

I went back in forth on how avoiding isn't ALWAYS a bad thing, mostly because I was wanting to avoid dealing with my issue of avoidance. Example one and three up there I shouldn't do, I get that. They are both ridiculous and dumb. But the second example is where I got tied up. Confronting people sometimes makes the situation into bigger deal than it generally is. I don't like confrontation. I would prefer to be quiet, attempt to forget my problems, and just let the other person have their way.

I read Ephesians 4 today because "speaking the truth in love" popped into my head while I was processing all of this. Then I started wondering if feelings are truth. I know for a fact I have feelings almost every day that aren't truth.

In verse 2 of Ephesians 4 Paul says to be patient, bearing with one another. Does bearing with people mean "just deal with it"?

Then there's Colossians 3:12, 13: "Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you."

This is what I'm thinking: It's healthy to be truthful with people. Be truthful in a way that expresses love, kindness, and compassion. Approaching situations with how you feel is okay, but maybe don't approach thinking that your feelings are absolute truth. Deal with people with gentleness and be ready to forgive.

Oh gosh, this post has officially turned into what my brain is right now. A jumbled up mess of thoughts that I can't get straight. I apologize for sucking you into this. I'll attempt to find some resolve after finals.

I might just avoid it though...