Thirty One.

Yes, it is true, 31 days until graduation. I am so ready. School is just becoming like making your bed,a useless chore, unless there are guests and you want it to look good for them. I'm not sure how that analogy made since, but oh well.

This week has been filled with doctors appointments and not enough sleep. I think I need to change my attitude about things, maybe learn to be happier. A girl in my English class today asked me why I was always happy. I wanted to respond with ''uh, I'm not, in fact, I'm pretty opposite ''always'' happy.'' But, I didn't, I just said, ''I have no reason not to be.'' Liar. My goal is to learn how to know what I'm feeling. That is really really hard for me for some reason. You think it would be easy, to know that your sad, or happy, or angry. But I think that I have worked so hard for so long to hide my emotions and not share them with people that I've almost forgotten what all those things feel like. Sounds crazy I know. But, maybe I am. All I know is I feel overwhelmed by emotion, which ones I'm not sure, it could be because there are just so many there that it's hard to figure out, but I do know that it's overwhelming me, and I just do not like it.

I want it to be different, and I know there's a road I'm gonna have to walk for it to be different. The hard part is gaining the courage to walk that road. The great comfort- knowing He will see me through.

Good Stuff.

This past weekend was really great.

On Saturday we went to the body world exhibit, it was pretty amazing. We are so complex, it's amazing how everything works together. After that fun educational experience, Lauren and I headed off to the American Airlines Center to watch the Mavs play some ball. They kicked some rear, they were ahead by at least 20pts the majority of the game. It was really fun though, I sat by a nice old man who offered us some of his popcorn, and told me I could be an acrobat. That's not a complement you get every day...I was pretty happy about it. Sunday, Easter and my birthday, was also wonderful. It was a day made special by some of my favorite people on the planet. :D My dream of getting a sword came true, what more could I ask for? Monday Alisa and I went to Lubbock to visit Texas Tech. It was really fun to see the campus and picture myself there. It made me a little scared, leaving everything I have ever known and starting my own life...really really exciting, but scary. I got some questions answered and now I'm feeling a little more confident in being able to do this whole college thing. Tuesday unfortunatly, I had to return to school...not too bad I guess, I was just real tired, and had some trouble getting pumped up about singing our corny Beatles medley in choir.

The rest of the week has gone smoothly so far, things seem to be coming together for financial aid and such (hopefully). My dad is supposed to be in town tonight, it would be good to see him. I hope that works out.

I think I have more to write, but maybe later.

Ikabok.

Alright, so no progress has been made on the journal typing (sorry pals, but other things have been 1st on my list of things to do) BUT I promise to at least attempt to make some progress.

WHAT A CRAZY WEEK! A little more crazy than usual actually. But, things seem to be coming to a positive close. I don't have a brain tumor, and I'm back in school. If more people read this that were possibly clueless to the happenings this past week I would go into detail, but I don't see a need.

My brother Austin adopted an iguana, whom he named Ikabok. I should have thought to ask the reason why this name came to be, but because of my brothers personality and past animal namings this name didn't surprise me one bit, so I didn't think to ask. Ikabok is rude. He slapped me with his tail a couple times and made a snorting sound at me (which Austin says is his disapproval of the way I was holding him...thanks iguana expert man.) So here he is with his new love...
Tomorrow is UIL. That means the last time to ever have to sight read for a contest, and the last time to wear the oh so lovely choir dresses. I'm really depressed about this. FALSE. Although UIL has approached way too fast for my liking, I'm excited about not having to wear the dress ever again (unless I flunk my senior year and get to be in choir again).

My birthday (and Austins) is on Sunday. 18! (and 15!) :D It's probably the most eventful birthday of your entire life if you ask me. As an 18 year old you can: purchase tobacco products (YAY! ha.), buy swords (double yay!) and vote. Along with some other significant things that I'm sure I just don't know about yet. Downside: to get your license renewed it costs $35 instead of the usual $5. LAME-O.

Any sweet birthday ideas you can think of are welcome. And gift ideas for my strange little 15 year old brother too!

Be blessed!