Life versus even more life

Another good weekend. I'm more and more thankful for weekends with every passing one. Good time to relax, be with friends, catch up on studying...lots of catching up on studying. I have become a more determined person since my last post on bio-organic chemistry thanks to much praying, and encouragement from the wonderful, uplifting people in my life. I've been convinced and have come to the conclusion of: I can do it!

Church yesterday what such a blessing, as usual. We're going through Philippians at the Vista, and I've already learned so much. I'm grateful to be a part of such a loving body here and have a pastor who teaches the word (a necessity that I have noticed often does not happen at some churches). God's provision is so good!

"...The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this I rejoice. Yes, and I will continue to rejoice, for I know that through your prayers and the help given by the Spirit of Jesus Christ, what has happened to me will turn out for my deliverance. I eagerly expect and hope that I will in no way be ashamed, but will have sufficient courage so that now as always Christ will be exalted in my body, whether by life or by death." -Philippians 1:18-20

Paul. He is definitely a fellow that I would love to have coffee with.
He doesn't know where God is taking him, he is in prison AGAIN, he has endured so much yet he doesn't expect God's deliverance from the tortures of his life...he is confident. Confident in the prayers of the Philippians and most importantly, confident in the Spirit of Jesus Christ. As I have grown in my faith in Christ, I have also (as to be expected) have grown in my confidence in him, but gosh, my confidence is teeny compared to that of Paul's! I can think of many times in the past when I expected God's deliverance, however, my idea of deliverance was extremely different that Paul's. He had "sufficient courage so that Christ would be exalted in his body, whether by life or death." My idea of deliverance was "God will rescue me because I am his child." I'm not sure, but I don't think God ever promises us that he will rescue us, or free us from the pain and turmoil that we suffer on earth, besides through salvation, leaving earth and going to heaven. I know that God doesn't tell us that life as a Christian will be painless, consisting of no suffering, but often times that is what I expected. My idea of deliverance was not one of confidence in Christ or courage, rather one of my troubles and pain simply being taken away. I don't expect to ever have to go through what my past consists of again, but I pray that when other struggles and hardships come along I will be confident in Jesus and I will desire to exalt him through living or dying.

Because either way, as believers, we're living.

Relax, take it easy.

I've gone on a mini-mind vacation to here....

A place filled with peace, and no bio organic chemistry.

Ahhhhhhhh.

48

That is what I got on my bio-organic chemistry test. I know, it's terrible right? I knew I did horrible, but I wasn't expecting THAT much horribleness. I don't think I have ever done that bad on a test, ever. Well, maybe in 3rd grade when we did multiplication tables, I really stunk at those. I feel embarrassed about how terrible I did. I'm disappointed because the amount of work I put into it was definitely NOT 48 worthy. Honestly, I didn't work as hard as I could've, but I should have done better than that.

I'm trying hard to listen to Jesus...
"...But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
Matthew 6 is about a lot of things...giving to the needy, prayer, fasting, storing up treasures in heaven, and worrying. I was convicted of my worrying when I read this passage today. Ever since I took the test yesterday I have been in this funk that not even a delicious dinner, cookies, dancing to Mika, and talking could get me out of. When I read those words that Jesus spoke "today has enough trouble of its own." I thought, "yeah, no kidding, I flippin bombed this test...not only bombed it, but chewed it up, spit it out, and ran it over with a huge tractor." Soon after that thought, I realized how irrational I was being and that my interpretation was probably not what Jesus was wanting me to think when I read his words. "But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness..." OHHH okay. Do every thing with his kingdom, and his glory in mind? Ding ding ding, you are correct! In the long run my 48 on a test bio-organic chemistry will not matter. whew. good thing.

I am aware that school is important, and by doing well in school in His name, we bring glory to Him. I'm also aware that my 48 most likely did not bring him glory. I'm ashamed to write how terribly I did, but I desire to do better. Not so I can graduate and be a really super rich nurse (because that usually happens...), but so I can graduate and be a nurse who shows hurting people the love of God. That's all really. I pray that bio-organic chemistry doesn't stop me from doing that.

My my my, it's a beautiful day

Oh, what a fun weekend. Kelsey's birthday celebration was on Saturday. We went to Austin and shopped around, ate good food, saw a movie, and had a fun time just spending time all together. It was a fun day and night. Sunday the choir sang at FBC Temple, after that Lauren and I made another trek to Austin for a fun day at the Pecan Street Craft Fair (which actually, deceivingly, is not on Pecan Street). It was so crowded, and so so so fun. Lots of entertaining, interesting people. We had a funnel cake and some delicious lemonade...great day.

My first test is tomorrow, and in bio-org. chem. I am very nervous about it. I hope all my efforts to understand pay off.

People like this make life fun:

This is an Austin street band at the craft festival that Lauren and I went to yesterday. The guy with the accordion had some awesome moves, the guy in the boxers and clown nose was actually pretty good, and I really liked the guy with the kazoo on his harmonica stand. :)

Boo!

What is it about a good scare that is so hilarious to me? I'm not sure, but it's funny. My suitemate Sarah and I are currently having a little "suite-war". I scare her, and she "gets me back". I haven't been too impressed with her comebacks, but I'm definitely anticipating one soon, considering yesterday I snuck in her closet (while she was sitting at her computer) with out her seeing me and scared her pretty bad (or good?). :D

Hopefully I wont have a heart attack when she gives me a taste of my own medicine...

Edit: That video makes me laugh EVERY time I watch it. Especially when the big blow up lizard thing scares that poor croc. hunter to death. Do I have a sickness?

Beginning to Fall

I love stepping outside in the morning expecting the same sticky warmth that has been greeting us for months, and instead getting a surprise hello from a cool breeze and goosebumps.

It was a fun walking to class this morning watching people shiver in their tank tops and shorts. It's 70 degrees and we're wondering where the snow is.

Thanks for the surprise hello, Fall. Keep 'em coming!

In my search for ideas for the perfect epitaph for my Death and Dying project I came across this:
It helped this semi sobering project become a little humorous.

This little light

Wow. What a day.
Thursdays feel so long.
After chem my brain hurt.

After class I plopped down on my bed and was thinking of the things I need to do. Laundry, call the bank, go by registrars, find a job, STUDY, etcetera, etcetera. Things seem so important. Some things are, but a lot aren't.

I ran into a friend that I used to work with tonight. What a blessing. She helped me remember what is really important. Showing people God's love. Not things. Love.

There is a Leeland song called "Wake up" that has powerful and convicting lyrics.
"You know it's sad that the gift we have we keep it for ourselves most of the time. The world is looking for a love that's locked up inside these four walls. Break the door down and shine. We need to wake up, live like God, and pour out love."
I like them so much. I like songs that speak truth, difficult truth. It's good to be reminded of those truths.

I'm grateful for the reminder I got tonight.

Let's shine.

"I love the Lord, for he heard my voice; he heard my cry for mercy. Because he turned his ear to me, I will call on him as long as I live. The cords of death entangled me, the anguish of the grave came upon me; I was overcome by trouble and sorrow. Then I called on the name of the Lord: "O Lord, save me!" The Lord is gracious and righteous; our God is full of compassion. The Lord protects the simplehearted; when I was in great need, he saved me. Be at rest once more, O my soul, for the Lord has been good to you. For you, O Lord, have delivered my soul from death, my eyes from tears, and my feet from stumbling."
-Psalm 116:1-8